Recognizing Your Own Struggles

Learning a new skill often feels like navigating uncharted territory. Many individuals abandon their pursuits early on due to the overwhelming uncertainties. The key is to acknowledge your lack of knowledge and trust that understanding will come as you push through these tough phases.

For instance, consider learning to play the guitar. It’s easy to let go of control when you consciously engage with the learning process. However, it’s much harder to identify your struggles when the reasons for your challenges are unclear.

Life is replete with challenges, and each one you face and overcome strengthens your resilience. The first step is to identify your struggles for what they are and to persist through them. Starting a new job or raising children presents a myriad of challenges, often clouded by emotional ties, making it difficult to view them as learning opportunities.

Learn to identify, label, and accept your struggles, as there are lessons to be gleaned—whether you like it or not.

The Skill of Allowing Struggle

Your capacity to recognize your own struggles can enhance your ability to perceive them in others. Whether you are a manager, teacher, or mentor, your "struggle skills" will be invaluable. A proficient guide knows when to let someone grapple with their issues, when to provide subtle guidance, and when to intervene directly.

Your approach to helping others navigate their challenges significantly influences their willingness to accept your assistance. Missteps can damage trust and exacerbate their struggles.

Different individuals cope with stress differently, so it’s crucial to recognize when someone is nearing their breaking point. Understanding how they respond to advice is essential; for example, someone with Oppositional Defiance Disorder may resist direct instructions.

Don't Equate Struggling with Suffering

While assisting others through their struggles, it’s important not to conflate their pain with a positive learning experience. Pay attention to how their struggles impact their mental health. Feelings of hopelessness can turn what could be a valuable lesson into a reason to give up.

Hopelessness is often a precursor to deeper issues such as depression. Being attuned to the spark in someone's eyes, or noticing when it dims, can help you gauge the toll that struggle has taken on them. Sometimes, simply asking if they need help or if they can articulate their next steps can make a significant difference.

If you observe someone suffering, don’t let them linger in that state for too long; it may lead to a decision to disengage altogether.

Struggles Are Temporary

One of the most frustrating aspects of struggling is the unpredictable timeline. Without a clear understanding of why you are facing challenges, it’s difficult to ascertain when or if things will improve. Cultivating self-awareness is key to navigating struggles and fostering growth.

I previously wrote a lighthearted piece titled "Embrace the Suck," which touches on many elements that promote self-awareness. While it doesn’t explicitly mention struggle, that’s essentially what “the suck” embodies.

To Improve — Embrace the Challenge!

Improvement is fundamentally about redefining what “better” means to you. Embracing the fact that part of any process will involve hardships can transform you into a lifelong learner, someone who appreciates both successes and setbacks for the unique rewards they bring.

Hopefully, you aren’t currently facing overwhelming challenges, but if you are grappling with some struggles, consider what lessons you can extract from these experiences.

Does Any of This Resonate with You?

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