Overcoming Depression: A Journey from Darkness to Light
Written on
Understanding the Onset of Depression
In January 2021, I experienced a frightening night where my heart raced, my vision blurred, and my body felt paralyzed.
"What is happening to me? This has never occurred before!" I thought. The atmosphere turned somber as my friends, who were on a video call, inquired about my condition. Unable to think clearly, I blurted out, "I think I’m having a heart attack." Despite my attempts to distract myself, the panic only intensified, leading me to awaken my mother, pleading for her to call an ambulance. The doctor’s response was straightforward: "Madam, your son is having a panic attack; it will pass. Good luck." This night left an indelible mark on my memory, marking the beginning of a downward spiral.
As weeks went by, this cycle repeated nightly, extinguishing my desire to move, eat, or engage in life. The doctor’s assessment was clear: I was slipping into depression.
The Silent Struggle with Mental Health
In 2024, mental health is a topic on everyone's lips, with advocates and skeptics alike discussing it openly. However, very few people dare to speak about their struggles in person, as a lingering taboo exists due to the fear of being perceived as weak and facing rejection. When we expose our vulnerabilities, our concerns are often dismissed, minimized, or ignored, viewed as a lack of willpower or a passing phase. The ego often prevents individuals from seeking therapy, as they wear a mask and continue with life as if everything is fine.
Nevertheless, this emptiness is a recognized illness that can be treated, allowing individuals to regain their zest for life. The first major step is admitting, "I’m not okay; I need help." Without this realization, the condition will gradually consume you until it’s too late.
A Disease Without Borders
As a teenager, I promised myself I would never fall into depression; it only happened to others, right? Reality check: it can strike anyone without warning, affecting a primary school child, a successful entrepreneur, or an orphan. Our minds are adept at burying forgotten memories, presenting them when we least expect it. Instead of recalling a childhood memory while passing a bakery, it manifests as an internal void, turning everything gray.
It's akin to a breakup where you seek to understand why it’s happening to you. Yet, this curse can also be a catalyst for saving your life.
Finding Meaning in the Struggle
No one wants to descend into mental turmoil; we do everything to prevent it. However, life is absurd, and when the alarm bells ring, it signals that something is amiss. Instead of asking, "Why is this happening to me? Am I cursed?" consider asking, "What does this situation have to teach me?"
Taking the time to reflect on life rather than merely reacting can lead to several outcomes:
- Identifying the root causes of depression
- Challenging our beliefs
- Discovering new meanings in life
- Exploring new possibilities and meeting new people
- Engaging in introspection
- Reevaluating nutrition
- Seeking therapy
This list can go on indefinitely, as there’s always a glimmer of light to guide us through the darkness. Although it may not be immediately visible, once you get close enough to it, following that light can illuminate new paths toward a brighter future.
How I Confronted My Depression
With therapy sessions underway and treatment in progress, I realized I needed to heed the lessons my depression had to offer. I believed I was happy, halfway through my computer science degree, enjoying memorable outings with friends, and having good times. So, why did I feel so terrible?
From a young age, I had ignored my emotions, thinking I should always smile and never complain. This mindset backfired when I least expected it. What followed was a lengthy journey of self-discovery and reflection, aided by philosophy and my therapist, which helped me reevaluate my beliefs about the world, myself, and humanity.
Ultimately, we are all equally strong and weak; no one is exempt from this truth. Understanding this has taught me to listen to myself better and find balance. I shifted my career path to sales, never anticipating how much I would enjoy it. My motivation? To continue exploring life, listening to the stories of those around me, staying curious about new experiences, learning about unfamiliar topics, and cultivating quality relationships rather than focusing on quantity.
To this day, I maintain that curiosity, allowing myself to grow as an individual. So, dear reader behind the screen, even if life feels absurd and painful, know that you can overcome it. Life is filled with challenges, and it is up to you to choose which ones hold significance and deserve your attention.
What I want to ask you is: What challenge makes the most sense to you?
The Final Word
If you, dear reader, resonate with this article, know that you are not alone, and you possess far more strength within you than you realize. There are numerous ways to seek help, whether alone or with support.
- Talk to a friend: Share your feelings and overwhelming thoughts with a trusted friend. Sometimes, merely vocalizing your struggles can lighten the load.
- Helplines: In France (SOS Amitié: 09 72 39 40 50 / Fil Santé Jeunes: 0800 235 236) and Belgium (Suicide Prevention Center: 0800 32 123).
- Psychologies Magazine: Offers a variety of articles, advice, and resources on mental health, relationships, wellness, and personal development.
- Keep a journal to track your mood and daily experiences.
- When you feel a crisis approaching, don’t attempt to suppress your emotions. Allow them space and practice abdominal breathing.
- Consider meditation as a tool to calm the mind and soothe emotions.
- Mark Manson: A personal development author who has significantly helped me manage my relationships and clarify what I want in life.
- Cole Hastings: A young YouTuber who has nuanced my perspective on the world and life, serving as a treasure trove for deepening my understanding of my thoughts and feelings.
Mental health is just as crucial as physical health, and there is no shame in saying, "I’m not well; I need help."
Any questions? Interested in a partnership? Want to chat? Reach out at: [email protected]
My LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/terry-haendle-b86783180