Chapter 1: A Life-Changing Experience

At just three years old, I had a harrowing experience on the operating table. I regained consciousness while surgery was still in progress due to insufficient anesthesia. The medication meant to numb my pain and keep me unconscious had failed midway through the procedure.

I was fully awake yet unable to move, scream, or even blink to signal my distress. The surgical team was oblivious to my awareness, and I felt every agonizing moment as the surgeon worked on my back, cutting away keloid scar tissue. It was excruciating.

When the effects of the paralytic wore off enough for me to cry out, the doctor finally recognized what was happening. He increased the anesthesia, and I soon drifted into unconsciousness again, blissfully unaware for the rest of the surgery.

In recovery, I learned that the doctor had administered enough anesthesia to sedate five elephants. However, I was chastised by a nurse for my screams, who deemed them selfish and disruptive. She suggested I should have been more composed.

When my parents came to take me home the next day, my physical wounds healed, but I kept the trauma of that experience locked away for 42 years. I felt I should remain quiet and not burden others with my pain.

For decades, I carried the memory of that day without much distress, more troubled by the nurse's reprimand than the actual event. It never occurred to me that my experience was significant or that anyone would care to hear my story.

Then, everything changed a few months ago.

While helping my cousin brainstorm topics for a scholarship essay, she shared her deepest fear: waking up during surgery. Her vulnerability encouraged me to reveal my own story for the first time. As I recounted my experience, I saw the horror reflected in her eyes, and I realized the gravity of what I had gone through.

But the most profound realization came not from the pain I had endured but from understanding why I had never regarded it as a monumental event. Despite the agony, I had not felt fear; my suffering stemmed from a lifetime of silencing my own voice. I had learned to prioritize others' comfort over my own truth.

As my cousin interviewed me for her essay, we delved into the depths of my memories and emotions. Uncovering those buried feelings was liberating. I articulated my truths, and with each revelation, I felt an incredible release within me, as if a heavy burden had lifted.

This moment was not merely intellectual; it manifested physically, bringing a sensation of freedom and empowerment. I sensed that I was confronting my pain head-on, and it felt transformative.

In our exploration of questions, I reflected on the psychological insights of Carl Jung regarding midlife revelations. I realized that while life can be daunting, I now possess the tools to navigate my healing journey.

I will no longer silence myself to shield others from discomfort. I am committed to embracing my truth and sharing my story.

Chapter 2: Finding My Voice

In "Traditionalists, it's time to WAKE UP! Guest Eric Hankins," the discussion revolves around the need for societal change and the importance of awakening to personal truths. This insightful video emphasizes the necessity of confronting uncomfortable realities and speaking up for oneself.

The second video, "He asked for a divorce after 46 yrs of Marriage - 103 Yr old's Lessons EVERY WOMAN Learns Too Late," shares invaluable insights and life lessons that resonate deeply, particularly for women navigating their own journeys of self-discovery.

If you're interested in the specific questions and reflections that led to my epiphany, please let me know in the comments. I would be happy to share those insights in a future story.